NAVAL_WIFE

*When Wife speaks husband must listen, But when a Fauji wife speaks World must listen.*

 It was 35th NDA get together at NDA when Mrs Sangeeta, wife of Cdr Asheet Malik , 72 year, Veteran, spoke and what a speech it was ---👇

I am Sangeeta, wife of your course mate Asheet Malik.  I stand here having been requested to say a few words about my journey in the Navy by none other than the prime organizer of the 35th Course golden Jubilee get-together Sartaj Sassoon.  Thank you very much Sartaj for asking me to speak. And Dubby where are you? Raise your hand please.  I must ask you to explain the reason for your suggesting my name to Sartaj and calling up and insisting that I must speak. Thank You Dubby nevertheless.  It isn't easy to say no to you.  

Okay! How do I begin? Well, every time there is an invite for a course get together or a holiday together, Asheet is most hesitant to join. He reasons that no one would know him. He explains his reasons but I don't understand them. He tells me that he joined directly in the fifth term as a special entry cadet and overnight his name was changed to ND Malik from AK Malik. He has to identify himself as ND every time he meets his course mates. I tell him that you are meeting them after a very long time. After fifty long years and you look nothing like the person I saw almost that many years ago. There would similarly be a significant change in appearance of your course mates too. Take it from me that if you confidently go around saying that "I am Prem Suthan! Prem Nam Hai Mera! The BCA," most will hug you hard, the Punjabi Jhapi way, and boisterously holler "Chikney you haven't changed a bit."    

Be that as it may, I got to see Asheet for the first time at a common friends house for the purpose of match making. I was then barely eighteen and he twenty six. My parents had met, seen and liked him. It was an occasion for him and his parents to write my ACR. I guess neither of us was interested in getting married. He moved around as if he was in attendance at a Naval Party hosted on the wooden holy stoned Quarter Deck of a ship. He barely looked at me or talked to me. He was engrossed in sipping 100 Pipers scotch and blowing smoke rings in the air, holding in his hand gold rimmed Dunhill king size cigarette . Simply put he was showing off and boasting about his escapades in foreign harbours. My mother frowned and may have wanted to review her hurriedly taken decision. Asheet seemed to be a Sharabi Kababi kind.  To begin with her decision to have her daughter married to Fauji was fiercely opposed by her near and dear ones. For them Fauji get killed in air crash, tank battles or go down along with the ships. Can't blame them, because, that is what they get to see in Bollywood films. Well I will cut my narration short by saying we got married more out of confusion and indecision than anything concrete. Perhaps both parents wanted to be done with their responsibility.

I have never till to date regretted our parents' confusion. My journey in the Navy began from NDA at the age of 18. So did Asheet's at 19. He spent three terms at NDA, that is one and half years. I joined him at NDA in 1975 as his wife. I too spent three terms at NDA and so I am as much ex NDA as him.

Life can not begin on a better note than being the wife of an officer in the armed forces. Navy, Army or the Air force. What can be better for a young girl to move into independent bungalow having a green lawn in front of the house and kitchen garden in the backyard? And   full time house help and a Mali to grow flowers and vegetables. There was no need to bolt the doors. No worry to behave coy and modest. The icing on the cake was that I was 1500 miles away from Delhi where my mother in law lived. I had never imagined in my wildest dreams that at age 18, I shall be addressed as Madam by officers much older to me and Memsahib by the domestic helps. The beginning of my life in the Navy could not have been any better. Asheet may have stressed in his twenty one years spent in the Navy but for me it was a party all through.  The beginning at NDA was a rollicking party and fifty years later as a veteran's wife I am partying here today with same josh and spirit. Why not?   I am as much ex NDA as Asheet.

I must thank the organizers and Sartaj in particular for making this great get together a reality.

I can continue to narrate, till cows come home about how much I miss the Navy and my journey through it, but would want to end by recalling an incident of goodness that is seared into my mind, body and soul. Asheet was then the senior officer 19 Mine Counter measure squadron. He in addition to being in command of INS Pondicherry had five other mine sweepers placed under his direct control. I was admitted in naval hospital INHS Asvini and was required to undergo surgery. As it happens before the surgery volunteer blood donors are needed before the surgeon goes ahead. It was unbelievable to learn that scores of sailors and officers from his squadron of ships were at the hospital ready to give blood. The blood of Navy runs into my veins. I will never forget it. That is the spirit of men in the armed forces. Later when he decided to prematurely quit the Navy, I opposed his decision. But he had to leave because he had little choice. I miss the Navy till to date. Where the hell in the world do people remember and get to meet after fifty years. Undoubtedly NDA, Navy. If I am given a wish I would ask that he re joins the Navy and I get married to him. No Shak? No Shuba?

🙏👌⚓🇳🇪💐